I loved this. It was such an interesting exposition on a character type that is rare on television and not talked about it enough. This gave me a lot of perspective. Especially as a fellow Muslim
Woman, the tie back to “jihad” and the different battles faced by those of varying religiosity, I felt seen. Ultimately, this archetype is complex and often alienated. But they are still human and experience the full spectrum of human emotion. Is it accurate to say that this person is repressed ? While this word has a negative connotation, the intent behind it can be noble I believe.
thank you for reading this piece and for your thoughtful analysis of it. i've thought a lot about that jihad i spoke of and at times i agree that it can feel repressing. mostly though, i feel it's made me a better person, a more selfless member of society. i'd argue we think too much of ourselves. the west could learn from that urge to serve before gratifying oneself i think. sorry for the long reply but i loved your question/observation 💕🫶🏿🫶🏿
I don’t know about you but in my experience as a Muslim woman, culture is repressive, faith is freeing. In my family culture, the word “love” is as bad as the F word. I told my younger brother I loved him the other day and my mom went “we don’t say things like that”. Meanwhile there’s a saying in Arabic that “there is no shame in matters of faith” meaning we should be able to talk about anything — from love to sex, to doubt — in order to figure it out and get closer to God.
I love this piece. Us religious folks do have a complicated relationship with desire (preacher’s kid here), and I loved watching BF Fleabag for the first time so much. I feel like we could use more complex religious/spiritual characters in our screens. (Mahershala Ali is such a beautifully crafted man my GOD)
ohhh loved this so much!! Reading this while watching Nicholas Alexander Chavez play a veryyy hot n horny Catholic priest in Ryan Murphy's horror melodrama Grotesquerie... girl... this troupe has got me down bad. Thank you for such a riveting dive on it
I seconded this! such a a great analysis! For the case of SATC references, immediately thought about Samantha and the hot priest from season four (I think?!).
First off, loved this article. I’m not religious at all but I keep finding myself really interested in this trope/dynamic. Have you seen the show Evil? Mike Coulter plays a hot priest named David who has tons of chemistry/lust with the main character, Kristen, a lapsed catholic. There’s this recurring “will they won’t they” tension (as in “will they smooch/do it?”) but it’s overlaid by this even bigger question of “will David leave the priesthood for Kristen?” Towards the end of season 3 David has this great speech where he basically says “I’m sick and tired of this world where no one keeps their promises”, essentially choosing to continue his service to god, despite his own feelings/lust/whatever you want to call it. This article REALLY made me think of that show, so thought it was worth a mention if you haven’t seen it already!
thank you so much for reading it and for introducing me to what feels like a perfect show?? this sounds like such a perfect fit for the essay I'm mad at myself for not knowing it existed lol but that dynamic you're describing sounds so much like that of fleabag and hot priest's. it's a trope i think that works really well and plays with so many extremes. i'm existed to see if the two stories differ in any way x
Yeah I reckon the show will be right up your alley! It’s also really funny and weird and has a lot of interesting stuff in it about “modern evil”, like how does evil exist and flourish in the world of TikTok and virtual reality (kind of like black mirror but less cynical)
This piece resonated so deeply with me, especially as I've been struggling to explain a choice to be celibate as a Muslim woman with someone I'm deeply attracted to. Thank you for articulating this so beautifully
i loved this! i didn't grow up religious, so i never had religious guilt about my sexuality, but upon entering my religious era a lot has changed. i still refuse to feel shame about having desire, especially as a feminist, but i always think if i'm being too selfish and if i'm still worthy of god's devotion.
this tussle is so common in people of faith i'm surprised we don't talk about it more often. i think on days when i doubt my 'worthiness' i remind myself that my version of God is one i believe to be ever compassionate, who created me with the capacity to desire in the first place. that i can't punish myself for feeling. if we weren't meant to struggle or emote, we'd have been created as rocks. i hope this reminds you to just be kinder to yourself xx
This reminded me of 16-17 year old me crushing on a hot seminarian that was visiting my catholic high, i swear there was flirtation and chemistry there. and then I ran into him a year layer at the basilica of America behind the alter, i was asked to read a scripture during mass and he was going to be honored with the other seminarians. he remembered me, hugged me every so closely and for a minute too long and there was more flirting and chemistry. i often think of him
Loved this! It totally brings into context why I love all the shows you mentioned. I definitely have a thing for spirituality and how it intersects with sexuality.
As an add-on to this I would love to point to “We Are Lady Parts” as a subversive depiction of devoutly Muslim women with tendencies that are considered atypical or even contradictory to faith. Though I grew up Christian/Catholic myself, their struggles with sex and sexuality and maintaining that, yes, they are still Muslim, felt like they spoke directly to me. Why denounce faith to accept these “worldly” desires? We are far more complex that what the idea of religious zealots and self-righteous atheists would like to make it seem
“radical testimony of worthiness” !!!!!!! I’ll be thinking of that phrase all day!!
That is what religion is supposed to provide no? And yet, growing up catholic all the (blah blah blah) overshadowed the love. Fleabag (and all positive religious depictions of religious leaders) that can demonstrate that “radical testimony of worthiness” and not the showering after sex vibe are SO healing…and as you illustrated sexy.
As a religious girly, I LOVED this! I just finished Nobody Wants This and I must say that the hot rabbi was such a different take for a male lead. It’s fun having religion incorporated in these series/movies as I feel it creates a conversation for both sides - the ones who are religious and relate to the characters boundaries and the people who may end up with someone religious and seeing their POV.
Also, I love the fact that you spoke on the things no one wants to say… your title is everything
I loved this. It was such an interesting exposition on a character type that is rare on television and not talked about it enough. This gave me a lot of perspective. Especially as a fellow Muslim
Woman, the tie back to “jihad” and the different battles faced by those of varying religiosity, I felt seen. Ultimately, this archetype is complex and often alienated. But they are still human and experience the full spectrum of human emotion. Is it accurate to say that this person is repressed ? While this word has a negative connotation, the intent behind it can be noble I believe.
Anyways sorry this is long! Great writing!
thank you for reading this piece and for your thoughtful analysis of it. i've thought a lot about that jihad i spoke of and at times i agree that it can feel repressing. mostly though, i feel it's made me a better person, a more selfless member of society. i'd argue we think too much of ourselves. the west could learn from that urge to serve before gratifying oneself i think. sorry for the long reply but i loved your question/observation 💕🫶🏿🫶🏿
I don’t know about you but in my experience as a Muslim woman, culture is repressive, faith is freeing. In my family culture, the word “love” is as bad as the F word. I told my younger brother I loved him the other day and my mom went “we don’t say things like that”. Meanwhile there’s a saying in Arabic that “there is no shame in matters of faith” meaning we should be able to talk about anything — from love to sex, to doubt — in order to figure it out and get closer to God.
oh wow! your mom really said that? 😮💨😮💨
I love this piece. Us religious folks do have a complicated relationship with desire (preacher’s kid here), and I loved watching BF Fleabag for the first time so much. I feel like we could use more complex religious/spiritual characters in our screens. (Mahershala Ali is such a beautifully crafted man my GOD)
ohhh loved this so much!! Reading this while watching Nicholas Alexander Chavez play a veryyy hot n horny Catholic priest in Ryan Murphy's horror melodrama Grotesquerie... girl... this troupe has got me down bad. Thank you for such a riveting dive on it
my absolute pleasure!!
I seconded this! such a a great analysis! For the case of SATC references, immediately thought about Samantha and the hot priest from season four (I think?!).
First off, loved this article. I’m not religious at all but I keep finding myself really interested in this trope/dynamic. Have you seen the show Evil? Mike Coulter plays a hot priest named David who has tons of chemistry/lust with the main character, Kristen, a lapsed catholic. There’s this recurring “will they won’t they” tension (as in “will they smooch/do it?”) but it’s overlaid by this even bigger question of “will David leave the priesthood for Kristen?” Towards the end of season 3 David has this great speech where he basically says “I’m sick and tired of this world where no one keeps their promises”, essentially choosing to continue his service to god, despite his own feelings/lust/whatever you want to call it. This article REALLY made me think of that show, so thought it was worth a mention if you haven’t seen it already!
thank you so much for reading it and for introducing me to what feels like a perfect show?? this sounds like such a perfect fit for the essay I'm mad at myself for not knowing it existed lol but that dynamic you're describing sounds so much like that of fleabag and hot priest's. it's a trope i think that works really well and plays with so many extremes. i'm existed to see if the two stories differ in any way x
Yeah I reckon the show will be right up your alley! It’s also really funny and weird and has a lot of interesting stuff in it about “modern evil”, like how does evil exist and flourish in the world of TikTok and virtual reality (kind of like black mirror but less cynical)
This piece resonated so deeply with me, especially as I've been struggling to explain a choice to be celibate as a Muslim woman with someone I'm deeply attracted to. Thank you for articulating this so beautifully
I really loved this (and kudos on the clicky headline.) I also miss Ramy!
thank you!! i also miss ramy lol
i loved this! i didn't grow up religious, so i never had religious guilt about my sexuality, but upon entering my religious era a lot has changed. i still refuse to feel shame about having desire, especially as a feminist, but i always think if i'm being too selfish and if i'm still worthy of god's devotion.
this tussle is so common in people of faith i'm surprised we don't talk about it more often. i think on days when i doubt my 'worthiness' i remind myself that my version of God is one i believe to be ever compassionate, who created me with the capacity to desire in the first place. that i can't punish myself for feeling. if we weren't meant to struggle or emote, we'd have been created as rocks. i hope this reminds you to just be kinder to yourself xx
“if we weren't meant to struggle or emote, we'd have been created as rocks.”
*obama mic drop* right there!
This reminded me of 16-17 year old me crushing on a hot seminarian that was visiting my catholic high, i swear there was flirtation and chemistry there. and then I ran into him a year layer at the basilica of America behind the alter, i was asked to read a scripture during mass and he was going to be honored with the other seminarians. he remembered me, hugged me every so closely and for a minute too long and there was more flirting and chemistry. i often think of him
and where he is today….
anyways, i loved this piece.
this was really interesting, especially as i haven't even watched both movies. 😂
Loved this! It totally brings into context why I love all the shows you mentioned. I definitely have a thing for spirituality and how it intersects with sexuality.
As an add-on to this I would love to point to “We Are Lady Parts” as a subversive depiction of devoutly Muslim women with tendencies that are considered atypical or even contradictory to faith. Though I grew up Christian/Catholic myself, their struggles with sex and sexuality and maintaining that, yes, they are still Muslim, felt like they spoke directly to me. Why denounce faith to accept these “worldly” desires? We are far more complex that what the idea of religious zealots and self-righteous atheists would like to make it seem
“radical testimony of worthiness” !!!!!!! I’ll be thinking of that phrase all day!!
That is what religion is supposed to provide no? And yet, growing up catholic all the (blah blah blah) overshadowed the love. Fleabag (and all positive religious depictions of religious leaders) that can demonstrate that “radical testimony of worthiness” and not the showering after sex vibe are SO healing…and as you illustrated sexy.
As a religious girly, I LOVED this! I just finished Nobody Wants This and I must say that the hot rabbi was such a different take for a male lead. It’s fun having religion incorporated in these series/movies as I feel it creates a conversation for both sides - the ones who are religious and relate to the characters boundaries and the people who may end up with someone religious and seeing their POV.
Also, I love the fact that you spoke on the things no one wants to say… your title is everything
I called Andrew Scott's priest "manic pixie dream priest"
lol this is how i shall be referring to him from now on
so real omg as an atheist this also pretty much sums up how I feel abt a lot of religious characters in the media I consume. wonderful piece<3
When you are interested in sexual liberation of women, check out Virgenie Despentes or Nelly Arcan. In case you don't know them already.